Psychic Update

Okay so I figured out a couple things since yesterday:

1. The MAR- grandma figure could very possibly have been my biological contributer's (a.k.a. sperm donor's) grandma Maria. It fits the bill and makes sense that she would be there. Very cool as I did not know their names (the other was Tina). Other grandma (or great grandmas) names include Francoise, Ida, Edith.

2. I'm pretty certain the "L" is for Lena my "purple grandma".

3. I've pretty much confirmed with my mom that my dad's dad's description of his ailments were correct.

My Psychic Reading

My friend Katherine told me about this medium who lives in Calgary & does readings. I went to her website & since I am fascinated with the afterlife decided to book a reading. I think it was in December & my appointment was booked for Oct 17th @ 1:30pm (which is today). First off I'd like to say that while I firmly believe there are talented people out there, mediums, who can channel spirits, I am skeptical of each individual until they prove to me that they have a connection.

So I told my boss I had an appointment this afternoon & I went home to wait for my phone call reading from Kim Dennis. I also kind of put it out into the universe that if there was anyone that wanted me to get a message to someone that they should go through me. Her receptionist told me that I should think up some questions I'd like to ask ahead of time, so I sat on my couch with my mug of tea and started to jot down the following thoughts:

"a connection, "proof", kids for me (cuz i worry that i might be infertile)?"

then the phone rang.

So I answered it. We chit chatted for a few seconds where Kim asked me if I knew what she did. I said I had a general idea & see said "well I channel spirits." And she just started telling me things. I'll try to get our conversation to the best of my memory (possibly paraphrasing or just writing the key words if necessary, & it might be out of order a little bit as i was talking jot notes):

Kim: You have a grandmother who has past cuz she has been hanging over me while i'm dialing your number. Are you getting married or already married?

Me: Yep.

Kim: Are you thinking of having a baby cuz i see a baby in your future. The grandmother is holding a baby in her arms. A girl.

Me: Well yes I've actually just starting thinking about it just recently.

Kim: [laughs] Well good cuz I see it happening within the next year. Maybe even Easter, or spring or summer cuz I see good weather.

Then: Have you been married for a while?

Me: Two years.

Kim: Yes, cuz the grandmother, i see her as already being passed before the wedding. And the baby has curly hair. Do you or your husband have curly hair?

Me: yeah my husband has some curls [he had very curly blonde hair when he was a kid, & i've also discovered, when styled right, i have some great curls so that made sense].

Kim: Well there you go. I see this a being one of two. And the second will be a boy. Both beatiful healthy babies. And you'll have no problems getting pregnant. [This made me happy cuz I wanted to ask about it and she beat me to it. Plus it kind of confirmed that it will happen for me and that Tyler does want kids. Hopefully especially when i tell him that the psychic predicted it LOL]

Then: Are you sick of your job?

Me: Well who isn't right?

Kim: I'm not. [laughs] I just see you as not hating it but not loving it. I see a change coming. But with the baby you probably don't want to leave this job just yet. [laughs]

Me: Well maybe that's the change!

Kim: Sure could be. I definately see a change. Are you in customer service?

Me: Well I've also started this side business which definitely involves customer service.

Kim: Well maybe you make the change to that. Just doing that when baby comes. Definitely stick with it. I see it going well.

Me: I had quite a few great grandmothers who passed. Can you tell which one it is?

Kim: Oh. Well that would explain why I feel two presences! I feel like one is Margaret or Mary...definately MAR. The other is an name with a strong L song. Lily or Elsie or Elly, something like that.

[I'm not sure on these. My grandpa's girlfriend's name was Margaret but after my grandpa died we lost contact with her cuz she was a nut job so i have no idea if she is alive or not. And wouldn't think she'd come chat with me if she had passed. My Biological Contributor's mom's name is Mary but so far as I know she is still alive. I am unsure of what his grandparents names were, but I just emailed him so I'll update this once I find out. My dad's grandma's name is Edith. My mom's two grandma's names are Francoise & I can't remember the other. I just tried to call her but she was busy. However I did have a lady in my life that I called "Purple Grandma" and I was thinking about her this morning and said I'd like to hear from her and her name was Lena. As well Tyler's stepgrandma that past's name was Elsie. But I don't think they were close & it sounded like the spirits belonged to me not him.]

Kim: Your dad's father passed away right?

Me: Yes.

Kim: What's the J mean?

Me: Well his last name was Johnson so it could be that.

Kim: Yeah that makes sense. (or something along those lines).

Then, there's a young man here too, saying "grew up together".

Me: [thinking she meant with my grandpa] Hmm, not sure.

Kim: Did you live in a small town? Because he's saying you both from the same small town. And he died in a car accident.

Me: [at this point it hit me that that she could very well be talking about this young guy that just died from my town & i started crying a bit] A guy I graduated with's brother died in a car accident a week or so again.

Kim: Did you read about it in the paper?

Me: Well online.

Kim: Yes, i see you reading it. You did know him though? Maybe not very well but you knew him? Cuz he's indicating that.

Me: Yes.

Kim: And you must have been thinking about him lots?

Me: Yes. Because he was so young.

Kim: Sometimes I think kids shouldn't get licensces until they are 18. He is older

Me: Well there was wildlife involved.

Kim: Yes, but he is also saying 'too fast', that he was driving too fast.

Then: Who is Nelson?

Me: Well that's me & my husband. That's our last name.

Kim: Oh, cuz that's my boyfriend's name too.

Me: His first name?

Kim: Yeah. You have a good marriage though. You like him most days, right?

Me: Yes, most days [laughs].

Kim: I see him going to be self-employed. Is he a tradesman?

Me: Yes.

Kim: An electrician?

Me: Yes.

Kim: Well I see that he's working of someone, and they like him, and he likes it well enough. But he's making them a lot of money. And in 4 or 5 years, after getting the experience and the client base, I see him going off on his on. He does very well. Financially. It's a good move.

Me: [head nods, that she can't see obviously] Cool.

Kim: Yeah the second kid is definitely a boy cuz I see your husband hauling in lots of hockey equipment into an arena. Hockey, hockey, hockey.

Then: do you live in a small town right now?

Me: No, we live in Red Deer, which is kind of a small town.

Kim: Hmm, well I see you moving to not necessarily a small town but an acreage maybe. His parents, do they live on an acreage? Or have some land?

Me: Yes.

Kim: Well you probably don't want to live on the same land as them.

Me: No!

Kim: [laughs] Well I probably don't even need to ask you if you get along with them. But I see you having kids bringing you closer together. That they are biting at the bit for you guys to give them grandkids. And I see them either helping you financially or giving you land for an acreage. And you are happy about it. In about 2 or 3 years. [This part was interesting because the psychic i went to in edmonton talked about us moving to an acreage in about the same time span as well. though i didn't trust in that psychic much].

Then: does your husband have a quad or a motorcycle?

Me: No.

Kim: Well that could be part of the acreage cuz I see him on a quad. Do you live in a bungalow now?

Me: No. A two storey.

Kim: Is it really narrow? I see it being really narrow (then described it in some way that i didn't quite hear).

Me: Yep it's pretty narrow.

Kim: And I definitely see you moving to part time work in one or one and a half years.

At this point I asked about some friends and stuff but she didn't really give me any information. She suggested that if they were interested it was best for them to get their own reading. But she did give me some advice on a thing or two. Then she went back to reading me:

Kim: I see you making a small moving first, locally, closer to a schoool. Then to the acreage. I see you walking your kid to school. So you will be having a family soon.

Then: did you just get a new vehicle?

Me: Um, well mine is sort of new [still paying for it so i think it's new LOL]

Kim: Well I see a brand new truck. So maybe hubby is contemplating a truck purchase.

Then: you mom's dad passed too right?

Me: Yes [and here i started crying too cuz i wanted to hear from that grandpa pretty bad]

Kim: With a heart problem [he died of a hard attack]. The other, your dad's dad was more of a kidney thing or bowels. I see that the kidney's shut down [i can't remember exactly what my Grandpa J died of but he did have jaundice at the end and he had many problems. this sort of rang a bell but i plan to ask more from my family].

Me: Yeah that makes a lot of sense.

Kim: Was there anything else you wanted to know?

Me: Well I just kind of wanted a connection. Is there any memories or stories you can share?

Kim: Hmm, I'm not sure how much time you had with them?

Me: My mom's dad died when I was 9...

Kim: he's showing me a pocket full of candies so maybe he used to always give you candy? [i don't remember]

Then: i see a lake. What's at the lake?

Me: Well he used to take me there. [cried again cuz this is really all i remember of my gramps. He would take me camping & fishing with him which I liked. And he had a dam built at the back of his farm & put fish in it so we could fish all the time.]

Kim: Did he have a cabin or trailer? I see you in a bunk of some sort.

Me: Yeah he had a fifth wheel [I always got to sleep on the table that converted to a bed]

Kim: And you will have no trouble conceiving so you'd better make sure you're ready before you start trying [laughs].

Me: You said you saw the girl right?

Kim: Yep...

Me: I was wondering if she had blonde or dark hair? [weird i know, but i want my girl to have brown hair]

Kim: It's a light brown [made me happy]. And you go into history and pull out a old traditional name like Olivia, or Charlotte.

Me: Yeah I've always liked those names for girls. Like Elizabeth.

Kim: Oh! That's a great one.

Me: Yeah but my husband hates it! But his grandma's name is Olivia so you never know! The kids you saw, any chance they were twins?

Kim: I don't think so, but I guess they could be. You don't have kids yet obviously! Cuz you wouldn't wish for twins [laughs] then goes on a tangent about that for a minute.

Then:Well. Was there anything else?

Me: Not really. Well there is one thing. [crying AGAIN cuz i'm sensitive] I have this obstacle and I was wondering if there was any advice or anything...

Kim: Have you seen the Secret?

Me: Yep.

Kim: Good. Cuz that is the key. You cannot think thin & be fat. Food does not make you fat, the belief that it does is what does. Embrace the thought that no matter what you eat you will be the perfect weight for you and it will happen. Do you drink pop?

Me: Um, a little.

Kim: What kind?

Me: Pepsi lately cuz I've been so tired.

Kim: Well that's one message I'm getting. If you eliminated one thing: pop and drink mostly water & tea [which i'm totally cool with] that would make the world of difference to you. And eating oatmeal for breakfast. And you need to do a cleansing for your colon. And when you see a person who's body you admire say "that's what my body looks like". Embrace it. If you want to eat cake say "I'm just eating it for the taste. The calories & fat will go right through me" versus "this will go straight to my ass. Cuz then it will. Smoking does not kill people. Millions of people smoke & it doesn't kill them. The belief that it will kill them kills them. My grandfather lived to 93 & he just died of old age not his smoking...and go buy the Secret CDs...they have some great tips for the weight loss.

Then she offered to send me her book if I emailed her my address.

So I loved it. She said many things unprompted and right on the money. She told me that there wasn't a lot to say because I had a good life, which is true. If you want to know more about her or check out her website it is:

http://www.clairvoyantkim.com/index.htm

Love to hear your comments! Now I have to get back to work before I get fired!!

Shitty Monday Morning (a.k.a. today)

So about an hour before I planned to wake up I suddenly become alert and turned my lamp on. Tyler, all groggy, is like "What the hell?" and my response was "I smell shit". Sorry for the expletives but that is what we said. You see our cat Baxter has been having bowel movement problems and we have found some runny BM's outside of his litterbox over the last few weeks. Unfortunately for me, Baxter likes to sleep on my pillow above my head. So I wigged out, threw him off the bed & out the door & slammed my door. Then I did the nose test looking for the offending poop. But I couldn't find a trace of poop anywhere (except for the smell that is). Baxter has been known for some stinky farts so we figured it just must have been that & went back to bed (after spraying some Fabreeze).

About two minutes later Tyler jumps out of bed & says "now I really smell it". So we turn on the bright overhead light & go hunting for it. We eliminated the closet & bathroom as the smell was pretty much non-existant coming from there. Then I was like "smell my hair" to makes sure it wasn't there on me...and thoroughly checked over my pjs & under them (just in case). We pulled off the bedding & still nothing. I suggested we check the dog kennels but Tyler insisted that it was a "cat shit smell" for sure. So we turned pretty much every logical place over in the bedroom looking for the smell. I peeked out into the hall & stairs and eliminated that cuz the smell was less out there. We pulled back the mattress and checked by the head board. Nothing. We're like "is this phantom poop?" Finally I was like, we'd better check the dogs cuz we've eliminated everything else. So I pull the two kennels apart & sure enough there is the offending poo. The boys (dogs) run out to get away from the smell. Then, instinkively (pun intended) Charlie decides to "shake off" and splatters runny poo onto our floor, the door & wall and worst of all ME. I almost threw up right then & there.

Tyler says "I guess you're showering with the boys while I'm cleaning the bedroom?" So into the shower I go with two poopy dogs (who don't like to get baths or anything). It was so gross. Oh & since Dominic hates baths (so he's stressed) & probably also cuz of the poop smell he decides to take a poop in the shower as well which was extra gross & I had to dispose of. Tyler's walks in and says "& you want to have kids?" To which I replied "at least kids don't shake off their poo". LOL At least Dominic's wasn't runny. But I don't think I'll be taking a bath in there anytime soon until I've disinfected it like 5 times.

The good news is that I was able to do my elliptical this morning, finished organized my H&G kit for my party tonight & show up to work on time (pretty much) with a Starbuck's Iced Caramel Mocciato in hand since I was up so darn early.

Sadly, after lunch I am off to the dentist to get a cleaning & a new wire put in so I will probably be sore this afternoon. I will however be taking some painkillers pre-emptively!

Ponderings...

Babies:
-So my 19 year old younger brother is allegedly having a baby.
-My friend Diana is now a pround mommy of 7 week old baby girl Jackson.
-My friend Shelley is now a proud mommy of 3 week old baby boy Regan.
-My friend Twylia is now a proud mommy of many months old baby boy Owen.
-A couple of the people I graduated with (and some that graduated before & after me) have baby or babies.

-My brother-in-law & his ex have a 14 month old.

Couple this with the fact that I just turned 25 and I suddenly realized that 30 is practically around the corner. Not that I think 30 is old or anything but I figured I'd kind of be having baby or babies around 27 (you know when you think up a plan when you're a kid). Now that this is only 2 years away it makes me anxious, nervous and optimistic.

Reasons to have babies soon (as in trying next year):

1. We both have decent jobs; plus I've been working on building a career with Home & Gift which would allow me to work whenever I want.
2. We are married & have been for 2 years. We've also been together for 7 years as of this month & lived together about 6 of 'em so I'd say we probably know each other fairly well by now & have had our "alone" time as a couple.
3. We own (well the bank owns) a suitable home.
4. We aren't planning on moving or up-rooting our life or lifestyle anytime soon.
5. Tyler's family would love it as they've been begging for grandkids since we announced our engagement.
6. Tyler works locally now so he'd be home to help.
7. I'm currently fascinated with pregnant woman & what they are going through. And I think I've always been realistic about what to really expect from children. It's not all giggles & birthday parties. It's sleepless nights, poopy diapers, temper tantrums...
8. My vehicle is family friendly & reliable.
9. Some of my friends have babies or are planning babies soon so there will be kids similar in age to mine. Including 1 or possibly 2 cousins for our kids.
10. People who have less financially, emotionally, intelligently have done it so why can't we?
11. If my little brother can be excited about it happening & not freaked out that why can't we as a couple be like that?
12. Many couples have problems conceiving & often even miscarriages happen. If we wait too long to start trying we increase the probablity of there being obstacles. Please if it takes a year or two then we'll be even older when we finally have kids.
13. In the past Tyler & I have seen many couples who have had accidental babies, or poorly planned babies or even babies had in an effort to save a relationship and the parents have ended up being miserable and the kids are often misbehaving. I think this is what is causing the anxiety we both feel over having kids. Now though, a lot of the new parents I know are very happy to be parents or my co-workers that surrond me have raised really well behaved kids (shout out to Katherine, Cheryl, Nancy) so I see that kids can be something you enjoy. And that you get what you raise. (p.s. i'm still waiting for them to all write me a advice books).

Reasons to not have babies soon (post pone it indefinitely):

1. Tyler says he's not ready (pretty good reason LOL). But I question if he'll ever feel 100% confident much like I wonder if I'll ever feel 100% confident.
2. I want my mommy to live closer. While she has said that it's a possibility that they'll move when their house is paid off - 4 years, I have heard time landmarks before (when Calli graduates) that haven't been met. Well Calli isn't graduating any time soon as she's not in school.
3. I want Tyler's family to live farther away LOL But if I'm waiting for that it may never happen.
4. My body is at the worst it's ever been and it's important to me to be healthy and provide a healthy start for future children.
5. I am currently "wage" at my job and in order to get maximum mat leave benefits I need to be "salary" which may or may not happen in the (near) future.
6. I'm not sure that I'm ready to stop being so self-ish & self-involved to have a kid.
7. I still cringe when I hear kids screaming & whinning in Wal-mart.
8. We have 2 dogs & 2 cats that are still a lot of work. When we first got our cats they had our undivided attention. Then when we got our dogs, we had to share our love with them too. I'm worried that if we have kids our dogs will suffer from less attention.
9. I still have lots of travelling I'd like to do & while it is possible to travel with kids it's a lot easier to do it before hand.
10. My one friend, Shelley, makes it look so not difficult. She could easily be nicknamed supermom! But I'm guessing that I won't be as easy going or as adaptable and strong as Shelley as been as that is truly the difference in our personalities!

So I've exhausted my brain for the day but be sure to leave comments for all three of my blogs today!!

More to Life...

Back from lunch...my ramblings continue.

So I went to visit my brother (and aunt & uncle & grandma) who live in Medicine Hat & area on the September long weekend. I also got to meet the girlfriend Crystal and boy Blake. It's funny cuz Blake actually looks like my brother, Cody. Both are tall, very slim, naturally tanned, and golden brown hair. Similar facial features too. So if he chooses to make a life with this girl they could certainly come across as a whole, "natural" family. Oh by the way, at this point they have moved in together into a trailer they have boughten with some "settlement" money Crystal is getting for some sort of accident (& she is taking painkillers for some sort of injury I couldn't see). SIDEBAR: When I say trailer, I do NOT mean modular home, I mean trailer in a trailer part that is kind of rough. But kudos to them for investing their money into real estate they can afford. And my brother, so cute, has been "fixing" it up with tiled counters and other fix ups. Crystal was nice to me and everything but she struck me as a little immature (very common you might have noticed) and I didn't like the way she talked to her son. I describe it as "big sis" talk versus "mother" talk. Things like "don't be a bonehead" came out of her mouth. To me a mother is suppose to be a child's safeguard no matter what & if she is calling him a bonehead (as tame as that may sound) it can't be good. Plus my aunt reported that Crystal doesn't really seem to have Blake that often, he's usually with his dad or his grandma and was generally very condescending when she talks to Blake or Cody. So I didn't have the best impression of her.

Hmm, one more thing you should know about my brother. There's sort of a big age difference between us (6 years) and I often had to babysit him & he was, well a psycho. Very bratty, always getting into trouble, very hyperactive, etc. Probably around the time I moved away to college he started smoking pot. While I don't advocate or generally approve of drug use, I will say that it has mellowed my brother out. He is much more calm and easier to get a long with than before. Though still very much anti-authority. So during my visit, on the day I was leaving my brother arrives at my Aunt's house (where I'm staying) in Crystal's car, no Crystal. Which is extra interesting cuz my brother doesn't have a licensce or even a learner's (pot might have mellowed him too out cuz he doesn't have the ambition to go get the learner's). When I asked him "what's up" he said that he had gotten into a big fight with Crystal and only elaborated to say that she was a bitch and condescending. The was the most pissed off I've seen him in a while (granted I don't see him that often). She called while he was there but he made me lie and say I hadn't seen him. As he was leaving (to go drink at a buddy's house) he mumbled something along the lines of "a lot of trouble to go to when it's not even my kid." Then asked me to call him when I was leaving so he could come say goodbye.

Probably about 4 or 5 hours later Tyler & I decided we were leaving so I called Crystal's cell phone (Cody currently doesn't have one & they don't have a land line) to tell Cody I was leaving. Crystal answered, obviously crying and said she hadn't seen him yet and was upset about it (and probably about not having her vehicle I would imagine) and that he must be pretty mad at her. I left thinking this felt like a break up fight and wondered how long they'd stay together. I started trying to think up "good girls" that I could set my brother up with that could lead him to the right path (no not religiously) and not be lead astray by him. This was Sunday.

Thursday night my dad called me, fairly late, and said to me in a voice "So, how are you?" The tone he used is one I'm used to when something is wrong. So I'm like "what's up?" He's like "well we got some news yesterday". I said "good or bad"? He says "Depends on your viewpoint I guess." I'm like "okay what is it?" He says "Guess." So I say "Cody's girlfriend's pregnant." He laughs, "yep you nailed that one on the head." So I asked if Cody was happy about it and my dad said he was. So we all agreed that although it wasn't the best situation if he's happy that's all that matters. But I was really leary of the whole thing as only 3 days before they were in a huge fight & now suddenly she's pregnant. So they say her due date is sometime in April. I have to admit I was a little excited cuz I will be an aunt through blood, not just an aunt in law & I wondered if it would feel different. I wonder if it'll feel different when my sister has a baby versus my brother as well. But it felt really weird to think that my mom & dad will now be grandparents, and not only that but it's not me making them grandparents. I've always joked that Cody & Calli would have kids before me (as I have a more structured lifestyle and am more anal about planning my life while they have always been "rebellious" and free-spirited) but I never really believed it. My mom is a little in negative shock as she is only 41 and doesn't wish that kind of responsiblity onto my brother that she had to deal with when she had me at 16.

I called my brother to congratulate him & he did seem happy about it and gave me permission to tell whomever I wanted to (which obviously makes me happy as I love to spread news) but my mom didn't want me to tell anyone until we "see what happens" whatever that means.

A couple weeks later I'm talking to my mom & I asked her how Cody was doing. She said good & that they were going for an ultra sound for baby that week (which seemed odd as it was still early in the pregnancy) and then said the baby was now due in May which lit many warning bells for me. I'm like, May? Does that even work?

So I googled conception calendar to see if I could find out how far along she'd have to be to be due in May (not nowing if it was May 1st, 31st or somewhere in between).
Here's what I found:

Source: http://www.pregnancy.org/pregnancycalendar/

So based an a range of May 1 to May 31 & assuming a 28 day menstral cycle (who knows?) her conception date would have to be between Aug 7 - Sep 6. Meaning that the day my brother told my dad (Sep 5) she was at the most 4 weeks pregnant & at the least not pregnant at all. So this indicates to me a few possible scenarios:

1. She got pregnant on purpose so knew to keep taking the tests until she was positive. A lot of people don't know there are pregnant right away. And a lot of people who have already had 1 accidental pregnancy (like her first) say that it's impossible to have 2 accidental pregnancies cuz you "fricken know better" LOL.

2. She's not really pregnant but is faking it to "save" the relationship.

3. She's one of the rare people that really do know early & went to the doctor, or wasn't feeling well & went to the doctor. It should be noted that she has had a kid before so she probably would remain what it felt like to be pregnant.

I should also say that while I suspect her of being manipulative enough to get pregnant on purpose or fake a pregnancy she doesn't strike me as the type to be screwing around. So if she really is pregnant & a baby happens I will love him/her with all my heart. While I don't have much faith for the future of the couple (my bro & crystal) I do think my brother will be an excellent dad as he's always been really good with kids and has always wanted to be married & have kids.

But another thing that this particular situation has started is it makes me a wee bit jealous that he's having baby before me and makes me wonder what I'm waiting for. I've always wanted kids: never questioned whether or not I'd have them, I've just questioned my ability to handle it at this given time and questioned whether my relationship with Tyler is strong enough to handle the added stress of children.

More on this pondering in my next blog article...

Life...

Well I haven't randomly blogged in a while so please be patient through what will likely be lots of disconjointed ramblings LOL

On June 23rd I called my little brother to wish him a "Happy Birthday" for his 19th. He was groggy even at 11AM, ha ha but we chatted a wee bit and he told me he was dating a new girl & her name was Crystal - a little weird as that's my name :-) but whatever. Then I teased him and said "well does this girl at least not have a baby?" And he's like, "nah, she has a 4 year old, Blake." Which makes me shake my head cuz 19 is pretty young to take on the responsibilities of a child and would normally scare a guy away but it doesn't phase my brother. In fact I think he enjoys it. Oh & p.s. the girl is about 22 or 23 I think.

So on that particular weekend that I called him, it was also the first weekend we were spending time with Tyler's family since we found out Tyrone & Kim were splitting up. Some background on that in case you don't know:

-Tyrone (born '78) & Kim (born '71) then started dating approximately in September of 2005.

-In December of 2005 they announced they were pregnant & due in August. While it's exciting to have a baby joining the family I didn't really approve of them having a kid together when they'd only been dating for like a few months, and I really didn't approve when Kim told me (the first night we met) that they planned the pregnancy in the way that they both chose to use no protection. And I really didn't think they should get married (although my father-in-law of course does) as having a baby is no excuse for marriage in this day & age. Especially since I haven't seen Tyrone with a girlfriend in the five years before that.

-Kim is an interesting mixture of enigma (like really what does she see in Tyrone), fun (hey it's someone on my side against the in-laws & a little bit like having an older sister) and irritating. Though I have to admit that she took the edge off of having Tyrone around (if you don't know my history with him that's a much longer story that you'll have to ask for).

-They move in together and it's fighting from day one. Tyrone is very condescing, stubborn, lazy & well stupid. Kim, while older, is slightly subservant, mothering, but also not so bright sometimes and quite immature for her age (currently 35). So perfect ingredients for dysfunction.

-Tyrone starting making comments to Kim that when she was on mat leave she'd better have the house clean everyday & have dinner ready for him when he got home (coming from the guy who makes less money then his girlfriend).

-Kim, in her stupidity, would enable Tyrone's behavior by sleeping in a seperate room so he wouldn't have to get up in the middle of the night. Have Kira bathed, changed, & fed for when Tyrone got home so all he'd have to do was cuddle her, read her books, stuff like that. Which he allegedly didn't even do most of the time cuz he was too busy playing computer games & online poker (another bone of contention).

-When Kira's birth arrived Kim's mom came to stay for a few weeks to help out. Tyrone & Kim's mom got into a fight(s?) which strained the relationship between Kim & her mom as well. The mom, quite correctly, pointed out Tyrone's emotionally abusive behavior and many faults (no education, broke, no ambition, lazy, pipe dreamer, etc). Kim was/is in denial about Tyrone's negatives so she isolates herself from her mother (who lives in Saskatchewan while K&T live in Calgary).

-Through the relationship ups & downs Tyrone called his mommy to complain about all the things Kim wasn't doing adequetely and claims that his mommy agreed with his side of things (yep mommy does enable him too) which doesn't help the relationship.

-Eventually Tyrone discovers "the Secret" a philosophy that says if we put positives out there & be greatful for what we have in live & act as though we have the things we want the universe will provide it for us. He incorrectly interprets this as "Kim & Kira are annoying so they are creating negatives in my environment so I should ditch them so I can win millions at poker. Oh & Kim is too fat for me to find sexually attractive." I have issues with this statements.

1) I'm sure ditching your girlfriend & baby is not what the Secret meant by creating a positive atmosphere, in fact I think it's the exact oppositve.
2)Tyrone is never going to win millions at poker because there are MANY MANY better players than him who don't even win everytime and any idiot can read the same books & DVDs he does that he seems to think give him a "leg up" on the competetion. Plus there are three elements to poker: luck (which you can't control), inherent skill (that you can't learn you have to have it in you as an instinct), and then the skills you can learn. So basically he's batting 1/3.
3) I don't believe that the pursuit of money is more important than family.
4) I firmly believe that if you choose to bring a child into this world it is your damn job to make sure they have the best life possible.
5) Kim is no bigger than she was when he met her & she's not that big & he is way more fat (& truly disgusting) than she'll ever be.

-After they officially break up in June & become single they still continued to live together until the weekend of September 15th. They didn't treat each other very nicely during this time & I'm not sure of their sexual relationship during these months but I'd bet that it existed somewhat which isn't healthy. And if it were me & my boyfriend pulled this stunt he'd be out on his ass immediately.

-Tyrone is now whining about having to pay child support or even taking any responsiblity for his child's life whatsoever. He hoards the fact that he "gives" Kim money over her head which is disgusting. He also doesn't seem that interested in making his house livable for her to come visit and has made such comments as "I won't have her that often" [to which Kim responded, yeah every other weekend] and alluded to the fact that he didn't need a crib cuz his 1yr old could sleep whereever (like the floor).

-Kim flip flops between bitching about Tyrone's behavior & exposing what he say and being upset about their breakup and wanting to be back with him. Again, stupidity.

-Kim has since spent a weekend at Tyrone's mom's with Kira without Tyrone which is good, but weird.

-Kim came up with Tyrone for Thankgiving weekend allegedly cuz our step-mother-in-law complained about having to watch Kira but I think she just likes to feel needed. But again, she takes the edge off Tyrone so I don't mind that much.

-Kim was still breastfeeding up until a few weeks ago when Kira was about 13 months old which freaks me out (personally) as Kira appears a lot older than she actually is.

P.S. I love Kira but am worried about her future as her gene pool is limited and her parental environment isn't always healthy. Hopefully Kim doesn't go psycho and play the old guilt & manipulation onto Kira.

What I find extra upsetting was that my brother, who is 19, is fully willing to date a girl and help raise her 4 year old son from another guy with no qualms while Tyler's brother who is 29 is unwilling to take full responsibility for his very own child. This both amazes me with my brother & sickens me with my brother-in-law.

More to come...LUNCH BREAK!

Recipe - One Pot Dinner

Okay so I am always looking for alternative recipes for the things we eat as I HATE repetition. So here is one I tried last night that wasn't too shabby:

Ingredients:
Potatoes
Carrots
Onion
Red Pepper (&/or any veggies you like)
Extra Virgin Olive Oil (EVOO)
Meat - I used sirloin steak cut up but you could sub stew meat, hamburger, chicken or even pork...
Spices - I used Montreal Steak Spice w/ my beef
Can of Baked Beans
1/2 cup BBQ sauce (your favorite flavor & brand)

Directions:

1. Chop your veggies & put into a pot with EVOO (a couple turns of the pot). Cook on medium heat stirring constantly until tender. At one point it may be necessary to use a little water or more oil to keep the veggies from sticking or burning.
2. After your veggies are started, start cooking your meat in a separate pan also with some EVOO. You can also add any spices you want to, such as Montreal Steak Spice. This one can be a little spicey so be wary of this when adding it in.
3. Mix your beans into which ever pan or pot is done cooking first & add the BBQ sauce. If both are done at the same time you can just mix everything together at once. Keep on the burner until everything is at the same temperature.
4. Serve.

You could make many variations of this by using different veggies, meats and spices. You could even add/sub rice, pastas, etc.

H&G Update

So just reviewing my party sales last night I'd say that I am over the $10,000 sales mark. I need to sell $40,000 by January 31 to get a FREE trip to Greece or $20,000 to qualify for the half price buy in. I'm happy with my success so far (started May 9th)!

OR if I hire consultants and they earn some money that is another route to go. If you're interested in finding out more email or post me!